@J_Boner took me to Chili's, then we went to see Agony Hill, and Denny's afterward on Friday. I spent Saturday with Chris, working on the music and whatnot. And on Sunday, I got another hole in my ear and some cool new earrings to match.
I remember as a kid, my mom always asked me if I felt any older. And I would look at her like she was crazy and declare, "No!" I was never 'old enough' back then. Now, it seems that time is going by faster and faster. Sometimes I fear for my future because of that. But then I remember that I still have a long way to go and there is no use worrying. It's the desire to get my life set, and impatience, that brings on these thoughts. I've come a long way from where I was a few short years ago, and I forget that sometimes.
If I've learned anything from it all, it's not to dwell on what you aren't, but rather, what you've become and are continuing to mold yourself into. I've always had high expectations for myself, and it can get discouraging at times when you're not where you want to be. But you can't judge your worth based on that- you have to look at who you were in the past, compared to who you are presently. If you've come a long way, you're on the right track. And keep going. That's all there is to it.
I used to fear that things were out of control, that I couldn't force my future to fall into place as I wanted it to. But I've relaxed a bit since then. I have no idea what's going to happen in the next few years, and I'm totally okay with that. I have plans, hopes, dreams.. but that's all they are, things to aspire to. I don't know what's going to happen. And really, I'd have it no other way.